


To all the Sheps I've loved before

by TheStarsMyDestination



Category: Mass Effect Trilogy
Genre: Complete, F/M, it all ends happily, matchmaking gone awry, silly fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-31
Updated: 2020-05-31
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:34:58
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,739
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24475846
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheStarsMyDestination/pseuds/TheStarsMyDestination
Summary: Everyone onboard the Normandy wants to see Shepard and Kaidan back together -- and of course they do, they're adorable together!! Will the crew's master plan work? Will hilarity ensue? Will there be enough takeout curries to sustain the battle planning sessions?? Or will a visit from Miranda Lawson render the whole thing moot anyway?? Also, what is Kaidan doing this whole time???(Complete - something silly, sweet, and short to cleanse the palate)
Relationships: Kaidan Alenko & Female Shepard
Kudos: 5





	1. 1. We have to do something!!!

**Author's Note:**

> Shout-out to the "Beef, Bacon, and Beer" Kaidan Alenko discord crew -- without whose support I would not have finished this.

"We've got to do something about this!!" Tali said, storming into the  _ Normandy _ ’s port observation lounge.

"What? Why?" Garrus and Joker said more or less at the same time, without looking up from their card game. 

"Shepard and Kaidan, obviously," said Tali. She began to pace, arms crossed in front of her. "They have been acting weird around each other. He almost shot her! She almost shot him!”

“I know that, Tali, I was there,” Garrus said. 

She shook her head, “They used to be  _ so _ adorable together.  _ Kelah _ . What happened?"

"Well she was dead, right? That's gotta be a mood killer right there,” Joker said. 

"What do you know!” she said, dismissing Joker with a wave. Seeing she was getting nowhere, she tried a different tack: “Garrus… you were here for it, right? When they met last year?"

"That awkward reunion? Ohhhh yeah," Garrus chucked, settled back in his chair and folded his cards, ready to tell the tale, spin the yarn. "It was me and Miranda-"

"The cheerleader, ugh"

"Say what you will, she was good to have in a fight"

"Whatever,” Tali said, waving away the compliment. “Horizon. Kaidan and Shepard. Spill."

"I'm assuming you've already asked her yourself?"

"Of course!! I didn't even know they'd seen each other! She didn't tell me! Me! Her best friend!"

There's a crackle of static as a voice pipes in:

"Respectfully, Tali Zorah, I believe Dr.T'Soni is Commander Shepard's best friend. Based on face to face interaction, Dr. T'soni has 78% --"

"Glyph!" 

Joker shook his head. Tali and Garrus stared at each other for a moment, then Garrus ventured:

"Liara! Are you eavesdropping!"

There's pause.

"No. Yes. Maybe.” Liara sighed a flustered little sigh on the other end of the comms. “We’ve been over this: What kind of shadow broker would I be if I didn't keep track of what was happening on the ship??"

"Calm down Liara, we can use you too on this. Get over here while I fill Tali in. Ok, so it's me and Miranda Lawson" Tali made a gagging sound which Garrus ignored, "and Shepard. We're checking a tip on a human colony that's targeted by the collectors. Horizon. A little creepy, but nothing we can’t handle. Then suddenly, out of nowhere, there's Kaidan. Now, I know the Commander, I'm her best friend after all. She was rattled, and good, but she didn't want him to see. She played it very casually, but I could see the light in her eyes when she saw him again, how she practically ran in to hug him,” he paused for a moment, considering. “You know, I never thought about it before, but that was when I really knew this was our Shepard. I'd seen her fight, I'd heard her talk, but it was the way she looked at Kaidan that make me realize without a doubt that this was really our Commander come back.”

"Wait, they were hugging? In the middle of a battlefield?" Tali asked. 

Suddenly the door opened, revealing Vega who jogged in and flopped onto one of the couches.

"Radio chatter says we're talking about Lola and the Major? They do it yet or what?"

Garrus and Tali both exchanged glances and pointedly ignored him. Joker, who had been quiet up to this point, sighed and folded his cards, giving up on the game.

"Not that stage managing our Commander’s love life doesn't sound like a fun time and all,” Joker said, “and I can’t believe  _ I’m  _ the one saying this…but do we know how Kaidan feels? Two years is a long time."

"You weren’t there when he first saw Lola again, back on Earth. The guy's got it bad," Vega said, shaking his head. Before anyone could respond, the door opened again and Liara entered the room, glyph’s hologram at her side. 

"My prediction is that without assistance, Commander Shepard and Major Alenko have a .2% chance of reconnecting romantically," Glyph announced without preamble. Everyone groaned.

“Ok, then we’ll have to help them,” Garrus said, with a bit of that mad Archangel twinkle in his eye. “Time for a battle plan.”


	2. Big place, big feelings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaidan takes a walk. Miranda Lawson has news. Shepard makes an appearance.

As soon as he was well enough to be up and about, Kaidan had started regularly walking the Citadel. Re-conditioning, he called it. It helped to straighten his thoughts out. Sitting still, things seemed to back up -- memories, regrets, uncertainty. But walking...walking helped to clear them out again. There was a time when he would have given anything for Shepard to be in his life again. Really, truly, given  _ anything _ . What he had forgotten was just how complicated she made everything. His feet took him up to the Presidium. It was a big place, but he barely noticed his surroundings anymore, so often had he made this walk. His path led him further, down through the wards and then finally down to the docking bay where, if he was honest with himself, he would spend a few minutes looking at the  _ Normandy _ . As he walked down along the row of floor-to-ceiling viewing windows,, his peripheral vision stuck and caught on a figure in white. lounging placidly on a bench, half obscured by a column. He slowed, stopped. It was a woman, lounging placidly on a bench, half obscured from view by a column. As he approached, she looked up as though she had been expecting him. He realized that he knew that face. But from where? Then the recognition clicked into place.

"You're Miranda Lawson,” he said, suddenly on alert but trying to sound casual. Her impossibly blue eyes twinkled and mouth twisted into a slight grin.

"You're well informed, Major," she responded lightly, “Here, have a seat.” She held a hand out to indicate the empty bench beside her. He shook his head and remained standing, clasping his hands lightly behind him. 

"I remember you from Horizon. You're with Cereberus," he said. Outwardly, he kept his face passive and voice even. Inwardly, his mind whirred. There was a group of civilians to his right. There were at least two more outside his line of sight by the viewing windows. He knew Miranda was a biotic as well, but even if she was more powerful, if he could distract her long enough for the bystanders to get to the C-Sec security office, he --

"Hmm, maybe not that well informed,” Miranda said, interrupting his thoughts. “Perhaps you haven’t heard? I’m not with them anymore. Differences of opinion on methods of operation between the Illusive Man and me," she said, sweeping back her long dark hair with a practiced gesture he surmised was supposed to be alluring. "Irreconcilable differences, you might say -- mostly thanks to Shepard. She gave me a new perspective."

"She, uh, has been known to have that effect on people," Kaidan conceded. 

There's a beat of silence. He's not sure why she's here, but he's determined not to make this easy for her. As the seconds ticked by, however, deep-seeded Canadian politeness won over. Certainly if she meant to start something she’d have done it already -- and probably in a less public place. He allowed himself to relax a little, unclasped his hands and scratched awkwardly at his hairline.

"Ah...is there a reason why you’re here, Ms. Lawson?" he ventured.

"Yes,” she replied, tone now clipped and business like, “I need to talk to you about Shepard. There are things you deserve to know."

"Oh?" 

"I'm assuming you're intelligent enough to have done some digging after Horizon? I know there were rumors that when we rebuilt her body, I wanted to implant a control chip in Shepard's brain to make her more easily manipulated. Those rumors were true --"

Kaidan felt his body falling into shock as though he’d received a physical blow. All thoughts ceased, replaced with a tingling void at the back of his head. He almost missed Miranda’s next words: 

"--but I want you to know that I didn't do it."

“What?” 

“I didn’t do it,” she repeated slowly, as though talking to a particularly dense child. 

"Does...does Shepard know this?"

"Yes.” 

The silence hung in the air between them like a soap bubble. His eyes darted around as though looking for an exit to the conversation. Had he been worried about something like this? That a Cereberus operative would come up and tell him that it was all a trick, that it wasn’t really Shepard? Yes? Maybe? It was an oddly specific way to pin down the cloud of anxiety which had settled over his thoughts since Horizon. And yet, what had happened here was just the opposite -- Shepard was still Shepard. But could he really trust Miranda Lawson? Cereberus Operative or not, she hardly seemed the kind of person to volunteer information without an angle. 

"I know you're skeptical,” Miranda said, apparently reading his thoughts. “But it's the truth and you deserved to know. Her thoughts and actions are her own. They've always been her own. More than that, Shepard loves you. She's always loved you." He raised his eyes to look into her perfectly sculpted face, meeting her gaze. He was surprised to see concern in those impossibly blue eyes. Genuine concern. For him? For Shepard?

"Why are you telling me this?" he asked slowly.

"I owe Shepard. It's that simple. She saved me." She started to give him that practiced smile again, but then stopped as though another thought occurred to her. Her expression shifted into something somehow sadder, but also more genuine, more  _ human _ , as she added: "More importantly, she saved my sister. She helped me get back the only person who meant anything to me. That has weight."

"I, uh, I’m gonna have to think about this.”

Miranda laughed and it sounded like tinkling bells.

"Think quickly, because she's waiting for you over there”

"What??" Kaidan whipped his head around. He glanced around stupidly for a moment, then he saw her: Shepard. standing at the window, looking out at the air traffic. She turned her head slightly and as the light caught her face he felt his heart just  _ stop _ . She looked tired, battered and scarred -- so different from the perfect, unblemished features of Miranda next to him. And yet it was a face no less dear to him for all the wear. Looking at her, his head acknowledged what his heart had already known when he took her side with Udina the day before: as long as he was with her, he was on the right path. There was something tying them together, a connection that couldn’t be denied or broken. As these thoughts flicked through his mind, Shepard caught sight of him and he heard her call his name. Her features relaxed into a smile that felt like a sun being turned on. _ There _ she was. There was his Shepard. He wondered how he’d ever doubted her. 

He began to take a step toward Shepard, pulled once again into her orbit, but Miranda, with impossibly quick reflexes, reached out and grabbed his arm, tethering him in place. She was sitting at the back on the bench now, just out of Shepard's line of sight. Looking down, Kaidan registered with surprise that Miranda’s fingernails were bitten down and ragged. 

"I have to go. I can't risk hanging around here and being seen by the wrong people. But first…I heard something said once, it's stayed with me: ‘Touch passion when it comes your way. It's rare enough as it is. Don't walk away when it calls you by name.’"

A slow smile spread across Kaidan's face. 

"Well. The infamous Miranda Lawson, a romantic," he said softly. 

"We've all got our vices,” she said, releasing his arm, “even me.” He watched with interest as she rearranged her features back into controlled beauty, all traces of vulnerability gone. He thought, fleetingly, how very lonely she must be. Before he can go too far down that line of thought, however, Miranda tossed her hair again and raised an impatient eyebrow. "Well, go on. Go get the girl, Major."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The "touch passion" line is [ a quote from Bablyon 5 ](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Babylon_5). The idea of Miranda saying this to Kaidan in reference to Shepard is actually what initially inspired this entire fic. 
> 
> Thank you for reading. Please leave a comment or kudos if you enjoyed, they really do make my life.


	3. My other idea was a ball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meanwhile, back on the Normandy, Garrus tries to hold everything together. Liara and Tali bicker. Mordin drops a bomb.

Once word had gotten out about the plan to get Shepard and Kaidan back together, it seemed like everyone on the  _ Normandy _ had wanted in on it. The room was packed. The card table was now littered with found objects, half empty cups, and takeaway containers arranged with military precision to illustrate a battle plan. 

Ok," Garrus said, surveying the group. "Does everyone know what to do?" He was answered by a collection of nods and more than a few giggles. "Just to be sure -- let's review the plan one more time. Traynor, start us off?"

"Right! So when Shepard comes to check in, I'll tell her to go to her favorite place on the Citadel --"

"Then I tell her Kaidan has been kidnapped!" Tali said excitedly. 

"No, no,” Garrus corrected her, “ _ Liara _ will say that she heard through her shadow broker contacts --"

"I'd prefer  _ not _ announcing to the entire Citadel that I'm the Shadow Broker, if you don't mind," Liara said mildly. 

"Sorry, through her unnamed web of espionage and mystery our dear Dr. T’soni has--"

"Legitimate question, Doc: how does all that work anyway?” Vega asked, not looking up from his takeout container of noodles. “I mean, how do you coordinate all that information with different planets and time zones and --" 

"Now is  _ not  _ the time, Vega!" Tali snapped.

"Oh, it's not too complicated, once you get the hang of it.” Liara replied genially. “Actually, it’s quite fun, piecing it together. And glyph helps of course --"

"Wait, are we actually going to kidnap him??" Kasumi asked, uncloaking from her hiding spot across the room causing several people to jump in surprise. "That could be fun! I take it back, I do want to help."

“Kasumi how long have you been on the ship?? You know what, nevermind, cut the chatter -- Liara is going to be the one to tell her,” Garrus said, moving pieces around on the table and trying to find the thread of the battle plan, “and then Vega, you get Kaidan. So say that this spoon is Kadian–”

“Hey, let go of my spoon,” Traynor said. “It’s a Piquant Dipper 4500, it costs --” 

“Fine, so this napkin is Kaidan and Vega is – wait -- where’s my glass??”

“I needed that glass for the brandy!” Dr. Chakwas said cheerfully from her spot across the room, holding it up and sloshing most of the liquid onto the carpet. 

"I still say we go with my idea, liquor 'em up, chuck 'em in a closet, and lock the door until they bang it out,” Joker stage whispered with a wink to EDI, sitting in her robot body beside him. She smiled in appreciation of what she assumed was a joke. On her other side, however, Javik nodded sagely.

"Your pilot is correct,” Javik said, “In the time of my people, that is exactly what we would do.”

"Come on, everybody stop talking and listen!" Garrus said, banging on the table again for order. 

“Yes,” Tali said, “if we don't figure this out then Shepard and Kaidan will never--"

Just then, the door opened. To the collective horror of all assembled, the open door revealed not the return of the Engineering crew with fresh takeaway curries, but their own Commander Shepard, blushing madly and holding hands with an equally red-faced Kaidan Alenko. 

“Hi,” Shepard said, looking somewhat dazed, “Well. Ok. I guess you guys are already in here. I should go --  _ we  _ should go. We’ll…leave you to it. Whatever you’re doing,” she said, yanking Kaidan's arm around and dragging him up the hallway. 

As the automatic doors swished shut, there was a long, long pause. Then, amidst the shocked silence, Morden let out a long suffering sigh. 

" _ Tried _ to tell you,” Morden said. “Sent message to Miranda Lawson ages ago: ‘Major Alenko needs push, assurances.’ Understandable. Alenko a good man… not  _ too  _ intelligent, perhaps, but Shepard likes him..." he paused to consider for a moment, then shook his head, "Must be a human thing. Oh, EDI very helpful too," he added as an afterthought.

"EDI?" the group cried out as one, turning to look at her in surprise.

"I've been reading a lot of Jane Austen novels lately,” EDI confessed to the stunned crowd, shrugging the shoulders of her avatar as she’d seen Jeff do. Then after a beat, she added happily: “My other idea was to host a ball."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I should have just had them do a ball, right??? I was too far in when I thought of it, alas. 
> 
> The battle plan layout and "that's the spoon I was eating with!" bit is from the [ Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy radio broadcast](https://www.clivebanks.co.uk/THHGTTG/THHGTTGradio5.htm) episode at the Restaurant at the end of the Universe. Again, ME borrows very heavily from the old scifi classics, so I felt it was appropriate to inject a little HHG humor. 
> 
> Thank you for going on this mini-journey with me. I had been working on this little thing for literally years. I didn't think I was good enough to ever finish, and it's still not perfect, but I'm proud of myself for finishing. 
> 
> Thank you for reading. If you enjoyed it, please leave a comment or kudos.

**Author's Note:**

> Next chapter is a little more serious and sweet, then we'll finish it out with a last dose of silly. 
> 
> Thank you for reading! If you enjoyed, please leave a comment or a kudos.


End file.
